"Our social media networks serve as a parent's modern-day baby book." Stacy Steinberg
On July 21, 2008, I posted my first Facebook picture. Of course, it was a picture of my children. If you do a quick scroll of my social media, you will mostly find pictures of my children. Like many parents, I especially like to post on holidays, birthdays, and special events.
Honestly, I love sharing pictures of my children with friends and family on social media. I find great joy in discovering snapshots of my friends and families' life experiences. Social media allows me to participate in their lives in ways I would not be able to without the online presence. And don't even get me started about the memory function. I adore seeing photo memories from years gone by. It's like a scrapbook without all the work.
The fairly new phenomenon of parents sharing images and information about their children online is called "sharenting." Because "sharenting" is new, we don't fully understand the long term consequences of sharing our children's stories online. Our children are literally growing up on social media.
A child's digital footprint often starts before they are born with ultrasound photos and gender reveals. A report commissioned by the UK Children's Commissioner estimates that by the time a child is 13, parents have posted about 1300 photos and videos of their children. While there are benefits to "sharenting", there are also risks associated with the very public documenting of a child's life. The UK report mentioned above estimates that by the year 2030 "sharenting" will account for 2/3 of identity fraud costing millions of dollars.
Here are some important questions for parents to consider before they hit the "post" button.
If used responsibly, social media can be a healthy medium for connection and community. I am not advising a complete boycott of all online sharing, but I do recommend parents think about what they are posting. As your children get older, make it a point to discuss family rules around posting. All family members should have the right to say no to a post. Set clear boundaries with grandparents, friends, and babysitters as well.
When it comes to social media, your children are watching. Give them a kind and considerate example to follow. After all, you might not want your children to share that unflattering photo of you on family vacation. At the same time, they might not want you to share about the misadventure that landed them in the principal's office for detention.
Want to learn more about sharenting?
I recommend Stacy Steinberg's book Growing Up Shared or her Washington Post article "Four Things to Keep in Mind When Posting About Your Kids Online".